Verse 1:

july 12 1987
the resurgence of hate brings me into this earth
with a curse
directed from my father cause to him i was a bother
from the start i was rejected he dont seem to regret it
moms was beat spat at with hate
flipped her confidence in men into a distrust in all of them
4 years into this earth barely new this individual
hes what you would call a deadbeat and a criminal
i talk to myself question his decisions
i could always sense he would never pass the outerlimits
of knowing me giving me love where its supposed to be
thank god for my mom protecting me from such harm
damn he couldnt do this for me 2?
was it his messed up upbringing
or something more conflicting
problems of his past got lost in the dash
but rather than go through them he hid his demons in his stash

Hook 1:

whats life when your circle around the same thing
thinking heavy of situations its nonexisting
inherits without choice
listened to the lower power
programming his soul and spirit to be sour
cant fight it
naw naw
hes in a crisis
quantized to the tempo of satan and his likeness
he dont want me i guess ill never know why
his negligence is live and mortified

Verse 2:

all this has led me to be subdued
on a route paved down onto a crushed groove
with both hands on my head i frown and descend
to a place where failure continues to regress
i detest whove i become
unlike my peers i tend to disagree with me being a good son
i pray my mother forgives me your son doesnt think highly of himself
im quiet but really screaming out for help
what's this
insanity and paranoia
my delusion
since i left california
at age 23 i could see it
depression followed me b4 birth it aint genetically a secret
now that yall know
its shocking to behold
how a dude so nice could think so low
in my defense if theres one thing i could say
demons stay locked in my brain every second of the day

Hook 2:

whats life i circle around the same thing
thinking heavy of situations its nonexisting
inherit without choice
listen to the lower power
programming my soul and spirit to be sour
cant fight it
naw naw
im in a crisis
quantized to the tempo of satan and his likeness
i dont want it i guess ill never know why
my negligence is live and mortified